I fail upwards.

This is where I break Mega Man like Dolph broke Apollo Creed.

Dear Internet Celebrities,

When you start declaring yourself things, such as “savior” and “defender” of you probably have lost sight of yourself.

When you script a fight with an evil version of yourself and you are not doing it to make fun of someone else who did it, then you probably are already on your way to being just like the creators and companies you think you defend your audience against.

Just an observation.

Agree? Disagree? That is what the comment section is for, snapperhead.

~Goose

Well, I am stunned myself. I am not even sure how to say this except you will have to believe me that there was wasn’t much probing

really there wasn’t. I swear.

I recall going to bed one day in March and I woke up a prisoner in an alternate universe. I was a sexual slave for women that had the face and skin of Jaba the Hut. You don’t want to know what their V-Jays looked like.

I survived by eats bugs and tucking food they dropped from the tables in the cheeks of my ass. Hey, you would too if you were hungry!

I lost track of time. I tried counting the days and months, but they seemed to slip by me. I pieced together that I was in the 31st dimension and that they had sent a clone of me here to take my place.

You know like Beta in The Last Starfighter

Anyway, I managed to escape fashioning a cannon out of old tampon cardboard and silicone droppings from the dwentels . . .well, you’d have to see the things. Sorta like birds, but more annoying I guess.

Wasn’t hard to kill the bitches with my tampon cannon. After that, I escaped. There were other people there I could have helped, but I had to run. The twochucks were coming. They heard the shots fired. Think of Big Daddys but they are police . . .and not like deep sea divers.

Anyway. I am back

Now, I am back.

Thank you