Well, I am stunned myself. I am not even sure how to say this except you will have to believe me that there was wasn’t much probing

really there wasn’t. I swear.

I recall going to bed one day in March and I woke up a prisoner in an alternate universe. I was a sexual slave for women that had the face and skin of Jaba the Hut. You don’t want to know what their V-Jays looked like.

I survived by eats bugs and tucking food they dropped from the tables in the cheeks of my ass. Hey, you would too if you were hungry!

I lost track of time. I tried counting the days and months, but they seemed to slip by me. I pieced together that I was in the 31st dimension and that they had sent a clone of me here to take my place.

You know like Beta in The Last Starfighter

Anyway, I managed to escape fashioning a cannon out of old tampon cardboard and silicone droppings from the dwentels . . .well, you’d have to see the things. Sorta like birds, but more annoying I guess.

Wasn’t hard to kill the bitches with my tampon cannon. After that, I escaped. There were other people there I could have helped, but I had to run. The twochucks were coming. They heard the shots fired. Think of Big Daddys but they are police . . .and not like deep sea divers.

Anyway. I am back

Now, I am back.

Thank you